So much opportunity!

So little energy.

Rest assured, though. What energy I DO find, I sure don't let it slip through my fingers.  Nosirree.  Alas, all of it cannot be spent pell-mell in the gardens.  Yesterday I managed to get caught up on the laundry AND (finally finally finally!) sowed annual seeds down in the basement on the heat tray.  (That chore should have been done at the beginning of the month, but a gal can only do what a gal can do.)

This morning I am pleased to be not weak and shaking, although a bit tired after yesterday.  Even so I've written up an ambitious list of chores.  I'll make myself do the shopping stuff first - that always wipes me out so I can't leave it for later. 

No worries about the rest on the list.  With a weather forecast like this, I certainly don't have to cram fun gardening projects into just a couple of days.   Easy does it, is my new motto.  A STUPID motto.  But one I'll have to stick with for now.

This April has been SO much better (weatherwise) than last: cooler temps and just over 4" of rain spread out over all 4 weeks.  Hopefully summer will be equally temperate as compared to last year's heat and drought.  Fingers crossed!  :-D

Last chance

I can't believe it's been nearly a week since my last post and I'm sorry if I left you all with a cliffhanger there.   But it's been a busy, frustrating and puzzling week.

First off, the good news is - I do not have Lyme disease or shingles.  Yay!

The bad news - I'm hypoglycemic.   Boo!

When I went for the blood draw on Tuesday I asked  the Doctor to give me one of the FreeStyle glucose monitor kits she gives out to potential diabetics.  I was convinced that a lot of my weakness, shaking, light-headedness, anxiety and headaches might be due to low sugar.  After all, if I can't gain weight, can't absorb nutrition well, wouldn't that inhibit the amount of glucose available in my blood?  She gave me one, but not with any heart in it.

I started using the 10 strips inside the box that day.  After an hour after both meals (lunch/supper) the sugar never went higher than 125-132.  But within 2 hours of eating the meter dropped to 100.  An hour later - to 80.  Finally 4 hours after supper, I bottomed out at 61!  Then the 'rebound' effect kicked in and it climbed back to 80 by bedtime.  Even so, I ate something before going to sleep.

Good grief.  While being hypoglycemic does not seem related to the random numbness, it IS indicative that something is just not right!  (I believe low blood sugar is a symptom of something else, not a cause of my ailment.)

Not only did I show I was hypoglycemic, but coupled with my latest blood work (elevated serum albumin & calcium - both of which could be caused by dehydration (the kind that drinking water does not help)) got me to thinking about malfunctioning adrenals so I (naively) was about to ask if by any chance she knew an endocrinologist, when she looked at me and said, "You're really stressed about being sick, aren't you?"  Well ... yeah... (Duh!  It's been 18 months.  Someone has to be!).  

Then she said, very slowly, "Maybe you're sick because you're stressed."  (huh?)  And at that point, the GP who has never had ANY recommendation for a specialist in ANY field, says to me, (wait for it)...

(waaaaait for it).....

"I can send you to this psychiatrist...."

 I can only imagine the look on my face.  No wait... I can.  Because when I tell this story (one at at time) to friends, their immediate stunned, deer-in-headlights, jaw-dropped expression must be how I looked in the office.  And, almost immediately, they voice what had been niggling at me for months, now:

For God's sake - get out of there and GET YOURSELF ANOTHER DOCTOR.  

My friends are right.  They are having a great time milking the humor out of this, but, they are right.

So now I'm off to find another GP.   What a drag.  I'm also off to find an endocrinologist because if I'm unable to keep hydrated, then more things will start going wrong.

Besides, what's one more specialist to bill me for no help?  All I can say is, thank gods I paid into Medicare for 45 years for coverage.  You have no idea how much it's cost so far for so many doctors to say, "All the standard tests are good."   I'm not even asking at this point for a doctor that thinks outside the box.

I'm looking for a doctor that THINKS. Period.

Sunroom sprouts

After all that warm weather last week, Thursday night blew in with really cold temps.  After the snow Friday morning, temps never got out of the 30s with the past 3 nights dipping into the 20s.

Brrrr.

This is the time of year I really appreciate the sunroom.  It's bright (I remove the skylight covers April & May), usually over 50 degrees at night and a fine place to view the annual potential of the back garden beds.

I took the time this Sunday to tidy up the geraniums cuttings.  I give props to the little violet plant that despite and care, heat or water over the winter, it never stopped blooming.  What a trooper!  I'm hoping that overwintering the geraniums in the sunroom and then rooting new ones in situ in the Spring will make it so I won't ever have to schlep heavy pots of these up and down the basement stairs when the seasons change.  What a back saver!

Some of these plants are well rooted (half) and the others are fresh cuttings today.  Keeping my fingers crossed they will all root and give me colorful plants for the deck.  I love a deck bright with geraniums.  They practically glow.

Meanwhile, I've brought in the onion and lettuce containers these past couple days.  It's just too darn cold outside (especially with the high winds - that does more damage to tender plants than cold).  This week promises daytime temps over 50s so out they go.  Nighttime temps, however, are due to drop though so will tuck them back inside with the geraniums at night.

I want to thank everyone who commented on yesterday's post.  I can't tell you how it lifted my spirits to hear from all of you and appreciate your concern, suggestions and encouragement.  Though I'd originally discounted the possibility, my friend has encouraged me to seek out an 'infectious disease' specialist and actually get tested for Lyme disease (d^mn deer!) and parasites.  I will follow up on that this week.

Meanwhile, the sun is shining and my friend Craig is going to come over this afternoon and till up that new crescent inside  the ring bed - increasing my veg garden by half.  How's THAT for a positive outlook. *heh*

=====   Anonymous posting disabled on my blog pages:

Hi to Lois in Canada (and all you other anonymous visitors).  I miss your comments, but due to the high volume of spam I got when I allowed anonymous comments, I just can't enable that function again.  Thanks for checking in. :-D

Bi-polar

Wednesday dawned full of hope and sunshine.  The weather was delightful and promised to be in the 70s (the week's been in a warming trend).

The hope was generated that I had an appointment with a new doctor at the Center for Neuro/Spine.  I expected info, answers and guidance.   I'd been looking forward to this for weeks!  The numbness is just so frightening...

When I came back the sun was still warm and bright, the birds were singing their little hearts out, and the daffs were at their peak of buttery bobbing brilliance.

I, on the other hand, was frustrated, angry and scared - again.  What I'd hoped for and what I got were so poles apart that I actually broke down and wept in front of the doctor.  I'd been told this practice specialized in neurological/spine issues of which DDD is one.  When I asked for info on my brain scan (apparently totally clean by the report and scans I picked up myself last month), he waved them away.  "If you've got numbness, you better see a neurologist."  Wha?  I said I was there for my DDD AND the numbness it causes.  He said, "DDD doesn't cause numbness."  And that was that.  Here I'd hoped to find a more caring practitioner of the neuro arts, but instead found another dipsh!t doctor.  When I mentioned the HUNDREDS of cases I've read on the internet, info from the Mayo clinic, testimony from nurse practicioners who HAVE DDD and numbness, he practically sneered and said, "Most everything on the internet are lies."   But if I had any questions about DDD he'd answer them (as he offered none).  So I had him interpret the jargon on the neck MRI.  (Total tokenism on my part: I'd learned everything about the jargon AND everything he bothered to tell me about DDD I'd already found - ON THE WEB.  He gave no new info or any reason for me to think he was worth the trip.)

In the end all he said was:  you've got it, it's not going to get better, only worse, the only thing you can do is get some PT to build your core muscles to support your spine and (wait for it), when you need surgery, then come back.  Riiiight.

Y'see - I've found out that Canton has ONLY 2 neuro practices within 25 miles:  One a bunch of neurosurgeons and the other a bunch of neurologists.  Now my experience shows me that the former is as uncaring and unresponsive as the latter and both are no better than my GP in this situation.  When I thought all my prayers were going to be answered at this last appt, I'd postponed (not canceled) that follow up visit to the neurologist.  That's sched'd for May 3rd.

Oh, I'll go.  Just to see what he says.  Me?  I've decided that based on all my (by now pretty darn extensive) reading that my intermittent (though persistent) numbness (everywhere) is caused by pinched nerves in my spine due to DDD.  Now we'll just wait and see what new denial the neurologist will present in May.  Should be hilarious.  I just hope I can keep myself from laughing...

Anyway, I was so angry when I got home I was ready to kick down a shed or something.  Luckily a cooler head prevailed and to find out my therapy-of-choice that day - CLICK HERE. 

The next day - AFTER that therapy (walks & garage visit), I was calm and up-beat and was going to do some garden work.  But first I needed to change a light bulb in the garage.  I got up the ladder, reached over my head and *snap*  just that fast the right side of my head, neck and arm when dead-fish numb.  Oh for the love of God!

It took me beating on it for a couple of minutes to get feeling back in it.  So much for optimistic and upbeat.  Hello total fear again.

The same thing had happened a week ago.  I thought it was an anomaly.  Crap.  I sat and fumed and thought:  I could go inside, rock and angst - or - stay outside (near 80s now), steer, and angst.   I chose the latter.  At least something would get done.  So I mowed the front an side lawns for a couple hours.

Friday the weather turned - really high winds and an 1/4" of rain.

Which froze last night.   We went from a high of 80 Thursday to 29 this morning.

And, at this very moment,  SNOW.

Honestly, like the weather, I just don't know which way to jump anymore.  I guess the only thing I can be thankful for is that at least I still CAN jump.

=========

I know these health posts are mostly unread, but keeping this problem to myself does me no good, spirit-wise (alone with no family support) or info-wise (clueless medicos).  I'm hoping one day someone with similar symptoms/diagnosis may stumble upon them and offer help or direction.  Until then, please don't stop reading the blog.  It's not all gloom and doom here at the Sanctuary.  Honest!

de-Borg'd - and bad to boot!

Yesterday was warm and mild, if windy and I so longed to do something outside.  Though my back and neck had been stiff and uncomfortable for some time, it didn't stop the yearning to DO SOMETHING PRODUCTIVE.  Especially since I was DONE with that irritating HEART MONITOR as of Monday morning.  (I boxed up that thing as fast as possible and UPS came and took it way!  Free at last!)  I had to celebrate.

I should have done a little weeding, or maybe cut back the dead stalks on the ring bed.

But nooo-oo.   This de-Borg'd gal threw caution to the winds, decided to haul the battery out of the basement, truck it and a can of gasoline back to the shed and wrangle the mower back into business.    (Sure will be glad when they make batteries out of something OTHER than LEAD!  *oof*)

Anyway, expecting the worse, I was delighted that the tires hadn't deflated over winter and the battery went in smoothly.  I poured in the gas, pushed the mower out of the shed, turned the key and -- VROOM.  Oh thank heavens!  Right out of the gate. :-D

I drove it up to the garage - where it sat for 20 minutes while I contemplated my next move.  Darn, it was nice out...

Okay, I thought.  Just a little bit of mowing.  I've got that spine appt on Wednesday and don't want to show up in traction, so let's just see what happens.  I'll be good.  I promise.

Initially, I WAS good.  I mowed close to the house in back for 25 minutes, took a break, and assessed my neck/back.  No harm, no foul?  I stretched a bit, had cold beverage, and  .... throwing caution to the wind, got right back on the mower!   Yee-haw!

I was out a total of 2.5 hours and got most of the back and some of the side yard done. I just had too - they were getting long and shaggy and there was rain forecasted for the next couple of days.  If I'd let it go, it would make for harder work later on.

There, doesn't that just look nice?  Now the daffs (right at their peak) are showing great.  (They look very inconsequential in these pics, but enlarge them and you can get a little bit better of their impact in the back gardens this time of year.  Even golfers stop to look!)

And a follow up note this morning (Tuesday).  I rolled out of bed wondering how things were and was amazed that my lower back was just FINE.  My neck is still stiff, more no more than before.  Wow.  Guess my reckless adventure didn't do me any harm.  Still, I AM going to curtail myself in the gardens this year.  Thankfully,  I'm done with bed building.  Now it's all about installing more trees and shrubs.  For that I'll arrange with N. this summer.

Today should be less strenuous, just some laundry and light housecleaning.  And then there's all the pre-appointment paperwork that doctors pile on you with before  you're allowed to cross their thresholds anymore.  They sure don't show THAT on TV dramas.

Doctors, rushing bleeding patient to ER, "She's conscious!  Thank goodness!  Lady, can you hear me?  Listen, we don't have your Mother's brother's son's childhood disease history.  We need that before we put you under to try re-attach your arm.   Do you have a pen?"    *sigh*

==========

Later, something new on the menu. 
Click the pic for details.

The Walda Effect

The first wave of Walda-generated storms started around noon, yesterday while I was having lunch with a friend.  We'd entered the restaurant to bright weather.  An hour later we came out to deep dark, lightning, and a raging downpour.  We were stunned. (The restaurant had no windows and we never heard thunder.)

The rest of the day went from there.  Wave after wave of storms - with furious lightning like I'd never seen.  It was like being under a monster fluorescent bulb with a very bad ballast.  It never got dark, but flickered constantly.  The thunder was so close together it was just a rolling noise.

Mid-Ohio was under a trail of training storms, one after another.  Each with tons of water.  I think I finally dozed off around 4:00 a.m. when it finally got quiet.  It's very foggy this morning and the radar shows another line of rain bearing down on us.

I checked the raingauge this morning:  over 2.5" since yesterday noon.

Oh wow.  I hiked back to the shed, found both of the barrels had overflowed, and had to re-attach the 'dump' tubes to the downspout so the overflowing barrels didn't continue to swamp the foundation of the shed.

I could have filled EVERY barrel (6) yesterday had they all been hooked up!

The rain is welcome - although spreading it out over a few days would have saved a lot of flash flooding, I'm sure.  Still, we haven't had rain for a couple weeks and what with the plants trying to sprout bud or bloom, a deep soaking like this will do wonders for the gardens.

As for me - I'm kinda ticked that amid all the electronics they sent me for this freaking heart monitor I'm wearing - why didn't they to send me SURGE PROTECTOR? (Now... where's that patient comment form...)

=====================

This week hasn't all been surge protectors and cell phones.  Nope.  For some REAL fun, check out what I've been up to in the GARAGE.  I can only imagine the kind of readings the cardio team has been charting for the past 4 days....

Garage step 1
Garage step 2
Garage step 3

Breakfast with the Borg

Dave compared me to a StarTrek Borg after reading yesterday's 'Wired' post.  ROFL

So, while ingesting organic nutrients on the deck this morning, my 'enhanced vision implants' recorded this bucolic setting:

Wow, the daffs are going strong and the birdsong is delightful!

Uh, I mean, there is a great deal of colorful flora at this location and the avian population exhibits excited (and very vociferous) behavior.

Enjoy the clip.

Resistance is futile....

Wired

My new cardiologist arranged to put me on a heart monitor for 7 days (to re-evaluate the ticker since I'm now off the lopressor).  Last Friday UPS delivered a box of, um, goodies?

Good grief!  I glanced through the instructions, poked at the wires and units, closed the box back up and decided not to deal with it until Monday. 

Honestly, it just looked too intimidating.  Also I didn't want to wire-up on a weekend when the doctor's office was closed.  In case I electrocuted myself or something.  Yep, I'm a wuss.

Monday I felt more 'in charge' so went online, viewed the instructional videos which were more helpful than the booklet.  Even then I was compelled to call the folks who make up these kits and get a little clarification on the cell-phone in the box.

After the vids, I glanced through the booklet again and saw that I had to change the AA battery in the heart sensor every day.  What?  I only saw 1 battery in that box.  Hey!  So I looked again and, (in my best George Takei voice) Oh My!

There was a whole 2nd layer of this crap!!

There's enough electronics, wire, electrodes, batteries, chargers, etc. here to build decent sized kitchen appliance or short wave radio.  *whimper* 

But, okay, let's get this show on the road, I thought and mentally slapped down the wuss.

There.  Look at all those empty sections.  Where are they?

They are either plugged into me, plugged into a wall, or tucked into my pocket (keep the cell monitor with you at ALL TIMES to record/send every symptom: chest pain, skipped beats, light-headed, etc etc).  Hmm.  Even one for "other symptom" which sounds kinda scary.  Hope I don't have to push THAT one.

Okay then.  7 days of the cyborg.  1 down, 6 to go.  Bet you guys aren't having THIS much fun now, are ya?  *urk*

Garden help

Until my health issues get sorted out, I have gone (kicking and screaming) looking for help around the gardens.

No one I personally knew were aware of anyone (family or friend) who would be interesting in some part-time garden work.  So last week I looked on Craig's list.  There was an entry for 'Gardener looking for spring-cleanup work'.  She boasted that she did 2ce as much as the pro's and cost half the money.'   Hmmm.

I called and we set up a meet.  She arrived on time.  And while she was friendly enough (and certainly talkative enough),  she certainly wasn't what I would ever call a 'gardener'.  To me a gardener-for-hire has plant savvy, their own well-used tools they prefer, and usually don't ramble on about a sorry divorce, insist on showing a plethora of dog pics on a cell phone, and the like. She wanted to use all my equipment, too.

Still -- I did need help with some of the heavy lifting and digging....  So we arranged for a 4-hour trial for 2:00 pm last Thursday.  She agreed to phone me between 5 and 7 that evening before to confirm.  Her parting comment?  "I probably won't be up to speed when I come.  It's been a long winter and the muscles are soft. HaHa."   ??

She never called Wednesday night.  She called around 11:00 a.m. Thursday.  "We still on?"  I said something and she said, "What?  *yawn*  Didn't hear that.  I just got up...."

That was the end of that.  I canceled her before she ever showed up.

Crap.  Then I sent out a shout to my buddy Craig (the builder, plumber, fixer, etc.).  Was his 20-something son interested in some ready cash?  He'd check.

Saturday dawned in the 50s.  Around noon I get a call from N.  "Dad says you need help?  I could come today if you want..."  Oh, heavens, YES!

Bless his heart, we got a lot done in 4 hours that afternoon.  

He cleaned up all the sticks and branches while I scooted around on a low stool and cut back a lot of dead stalks from the birdbath bed, brick bed, crabapple bed and arbor bed.  I left all the debris next to the beds and he then raked it all up and added them to the brush pile.  Then on went the nabe's dead Xmas tree.  The birds will have to find perching elsewhere.

Next he brought up 4 water barrels from behind the shed and he scrubbed out the 2 that didn't get cleaned before I stored them away last Fall.  Then I power washed them. He also brought up a couple of heavy hoses and 4 deck chairs from out of the shed.

Finally we did something fun.  The day before I found another Miss Kim lilac to complete one of the driveway plantings.  He dug the hole and I scored the root ball, added fertilizer and water and voila!  Now that little bed is complete with sedum center and lilac bookends.

N. was affable, funny, and easy to work with, making me feel less frustrated and defensive at having to let go stuff that I used to do so matter-of-factly.  Best of all, before he left, he said, "Call me when you need more help. You got my cell, right?" 

What a boost to the spirit!  Maybe this season won't be the train wreck I'd initially imagined.  To find someone willing to work and do a good job is near impossible these days, so I'm counting my blessing for sure.  Oh, I'm a little sore today, but nothing like I'd've been doing even ONE of the chores he took care of!

Meanwhile we're promised some rain this week.  I'm going to put the screens on the  2 water barrels at the shed corners and catch some for when I put in the cold temp vegs later in the month.  Now with beds tidy (well, we never got to the ring bed - but hey, it's not going anywhere), I can enjoy my morning coffee in the sunroom looking out over the gardens with a calmer attitude and brighter outlook.  Fingers crossed....

Out of hibernation

Remember when I brought in all of the potted geraniums into the sunroom right before the big rainstorm at the end of October last year? (Superstorm Sandy)  And how this was just a temporary stop on their way to the basement crawl space?

Well, NOT so temporary.  With my health issues, schlepping pots down (and then up) the stairs never made it to my to-do list.  So for over 5 mos(!) these plants sat in the sunroom - no care, no water, no heat, no nothing.

They bloomed well using their own reserves for a good 3 mos, giving me flowers for the holidays.  But they finally struggled.  But there was nothing I could do by then - I had other issues to deal with.

Anyway, a couple of days ago the sun was shining and I was feeling pretty good, so thought I'd at least clip back all the dead stems and flowers from the geraniums.  As you can see on the left, they pretty much just withered up.  (I didn't water them at all because I didn't have any trays under the pots to catch seepage.  So I just let them dry out.)

Poor sorry plants on the left,   clipped and watered on the right.

After all the clipping, I gathered up the debris for the compost pile.  Then, I went the extra mile, hauled out the vac and got all the dried leaves and petals out of the rug.  There!  I've gotten water trays under each pot/box, given them all some warm water (not much - those roots need to rehydrate else they would drown), and am hoping for the best.  Geraniums are tough plants.  Bet I'll get some good blooms from them again this year.

AND - now that the room is tidy, I can sit out there now on warm days and not feel like I'm sitting in a compost pile.  The rocker looks comfy, but my back sure isn't now.

Seems that while the lopressor has been going on too long and does need to be re-evaluated (the withdrawal has it's own side effects to deal with), the numbness STILL runs in spells.  I'm finding out that cervical (and lumbar) DDD can impact nerves & circulation, causing all this numbness.  I found a very helpful thread on the Health forum.  I was looking for 'numbness of the face' and found many folks with the exact same symptoms as I do - and mostl have varying degrees of DDD (cervical, thoracic & lumbar).  AND, lots of them - unfortunately - have the exact same clueless doctors that I've been having to deal with.  This is not rocket science.  Why are the doctors so stupid in this area?

I just can't wait until the 17th and my appt at NeuroSpine.  Keep your fingers crossed I don't get another dipstick doc.  *sigh*